Emo Phillips' Animal Square Dance

Each time I go to the Zoo I get enraged
to see all the innocent animals encaged.
With our lying, and war, and crime, and
bombing, and greed, it's we who should
be locked up and the animals freed.

The Lion and the Lamb
will soon get down
and then they'll be doing
the animal square dance.

The Cobra and the Mongoose
would take off their shoes
and cut loose. They'd be doing
the animal square dance.

Find a beast and doe-see-doe.
Grab that Leopard by the spots.
Bow to your partner the Rhino.
Goose that Moose and make it hot.

Everyone drink promenade.

The Hippo steps on a Lizard,
and out shoots the Lizard's gizard,
and the Elephant puts the Moose into a noose,
and the Lion kills an Elk,
and the Tiger kills a Gazelle,
and the Tiger kills another Gazelle,
and the Tiger kills another Gazelle,
and the Gazelles finally wise up and kill the Tiger,
and a Big Horn Sheep gives the Gorilla an exploding banana,
and the Moose puts quicksand in the cats litter-box,
and the Penguin puts a Chameleon on a piece of white paper for six hours
and drops him into a housing project,
and the Shrews tie a Duck-billed Platypus to a tree and drive a train set down his throat,
and Porpoises say 'Oh, we're safe in this enclosed tank'
and the Electric Eels say 'Wanna bet?',
and the Parrot tells the Monkey that there's no Monkey God
and the monkey lives a life of despair
and finally kills himself by sticking his head into a light socket,
and the Birds pick his bones clean and the people think he's a wind chime.

But, at least for awhile,
they were doing
the animal square dance.

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